Play ball! Finally!
When I heard talk around my office that a co-worker was putting together a slow-pitch co-ed softball team, I volunteered to be cheerleader. I’m not athletic at all and although I do know a fair amount about sports due to working in journalism for a large portion of my career, I have never played on a sports team ever. But I thought it would be fun to hang out with the team and watch them play.
When I volunteered to be cheerleader, my co-worker said, “Why don’t you play?” And I said, “Oh no, believe me, you do not want me on your team. I’m awful.” And he replied, “We’re all awful. We don’t care if we ever win a game. Most of the people on the team have never played.” And I said, “Are you sure no one’s going to care? Because I mean it, I’m really bad.”
So he and the rest of the team talked me into it. We had just two practices before our first game. When the team’s manager announced the line up, I discovered I had been made catcher.
After being rained out two Fridays in a row, the team finally played its first game on May 2. The good news is this gave us time to have our team t-shirts for our first game. The bad news is Gaffney’s Sports printed our shirts incorrectly.
I joined the team after our name had already been chosen. Apparently, some of the team got really drunk one night and chose the name “Fowl Ballz.” When I created the team’s Facebook page, I didn’t know it was spelled “Fowl” so I spelled it “Foul”. Apparently, the printer at Gaffney’s was familiar with our Facebook page (sarcasm) and spelled it that way as well in addition to putting the word “The” in front of it so that our Kelly green t-shirts read “The Foul Ballz”.
Why someone thought the “The” was necessary, I haven’t a clue. You don’t see the word “The” in front of “St. Louis Cardinals” on their uniforms. Why on earth would you print the word “The” on a softball team shirt? According to the teammate that picked up the shirts, the store manager was unsympathetic to the mistake. He rudely responded, “You’ve got your shirts, don’t you?! What’s the problem?!” Well, how about accuracy and actually printing the shirts the way we ordered them? I won’t be patronizing Gaffney’s ever again and I hope anyone who might stumble across this post won’t either. Word of mouth is one of the only recourses dissatisfied consumers have when it comes to the unsympathetic corporate machine.
I was really nervous before we took the field for the first time. I had never done this before. I was also sick and suffering from a sore throat. When I got home from work Friday, I had a fever, but I knew that one of the girls wasn’t going to make the game and I didn’t want the team to forfeit on my account, so I pushed myself to go. When it was our turn to play, we started out in the outfield even though we were the designated away team. That really confused me. Doesn’t the away team bat first? I was looking forward to batting first, which would have allowed me to get a little more comfortable with the game before I had to catch. In what universe does the away team bat first? Well, apparently in this one.
I took my place behind home plate and the umpire stood right next to me with his face so close to my left ear that I imagined I could feel him breathing in and out. I am the type of person who doesn’t like it when someone invades her personal space. Usually, if you cross the invisible boundaries, watch out! Unfortunately, I couldn’t very well tell the ump to back off, so I was stuck with the situation.
This was illustrated best when a couple of my teammates questioned a call the ump had made against our team. The ump didn’t change his call. Immediately after that happened, I accidentally stepped on the ump’s foot. I apologized and then I wondered if he was going to think that I had done that on purpose. So I told him, “That was in no way intentional. I’ve never done this before, as I am sure you’ve already realized.”
I’m not a good catcher, but the game never came to a grinding halt as I had feared. I wasn’t so incompetent that I disrupted the game. I didn’t fair very well during my two at bats either. I struck out swinging with the bases loaded the first time around. Walking back to the bench, I said to my teammates, “I told you that you didn’t want me on the team. I told you that you would be better off with me as cheerleader.” But my teammates told me this was all just for fun and they didn’t care.
During my second at bat, I flied out. Both times I was at the plate, the pitcher told everyone on his team to move up -- even my first at bat. He judged that I couldn’t hit just by my appearance. That really irked me. It was a flashback to my gym class days when I was taunted and teased by my classmates and picked last for every team. I wanted to say to him, “Do you really think you have to say that? I mean, aren’t all your teammates already walking forward anyway? You need to grow up!”
Despite that, and despite playing sick, I had a good time. At the end of our game, no one knew if we had lost 13-4 or 15-4, but none of us cared. It was a great night for softball at the park.
When I volunteered to be cheerleader, my co-worker said, “Why don’t you play?” And I said, “Oh no, believe me, you do not want me on your team. I’m awful.” And he replied, “We’re all awful. We don’t care if we ever win a game. Most of the people on the team have never played.” And I said, “Are you sure no one’s going to care? Because I mean it, I’m really bad.”
So he and the rest of the team talked me into it. We had just two practices before our first game. When the team’s manager announced the line up, I discovered I had been made catcher.
After being rained out two Fridays in a row, the team finally played its first game on May 2. The good news is this gave us time to have our team t-shirts for our first game. The bad news is Gaffney’s Sports printed our shirts incorrectly.
I joined the team after our name had already been chosen. Apparently, some of the team got really drunk one night and chose the name “Fowl Ballz.” When I created the team’s Facebook page, I didn’t know it was spelled “Fowl” so I spelled it “Foul”. Apparently, the printer at Gaffney’s was familiar with our Facebook page (sarcasm) and spelled it that way as well in addition to putting the word “The” in front of it so that our Kelly green t-shirts read “The Foul Ballz”.
Why someone thought the “The” was necessary, I haven’t a clue. You don’t see the word “The” in front of “St. Louis Cardinals” on their uniforms. Why on earth would you print the word “The” on a softball team shirt? According to the teammate that picked up the shirts, the store manager was unsympathetic to the mistake. He rudely responded, “You’ve got your shirts, don’t you?! What’s the problem?!” Well, how about accuracy and actually printing the shirts the way we ordered them? I won’t be patronizing Gaffney’s ever again and I hope anyone who might stumble across this post won’t either. Word of mouth is one of the only recourses dissatisfied consumers have when it comes to the unsympathetic corporate machine.
I was really nervous before we took the field for the first time. I had never done this before. I was also sick and suffering from a sore throat. When I got home from work Friday, I had a fever, but I knew that one of the girls wasn’t going to make the game and I didn’t want the team to forfeit on my account, so I pushed myself to go. When it was our turn to play, we started out in the outfield even though we were the designated away team. That really confused me. Doesn’t the away team bat first? I was looking forward to batting first, which would have allowed me to get a little more comfortable with the game before I had to catch. In what universe does the away team bat first? Well, apparently in this one.
I took my place behind home plate and the umpire stood right next to me with his face so close to my left ear that I imagined I could feel him breathing in and out. I am the type of person who doesn’t like it when someone invades her personal space. Usually, if you cross the invisible boundaries, watch out! Unfortunately, I couldn’t very well tell the ump to back off, so I was stuck with the situation.
This was illustrated best when a couple of my teammates questioned a call the ump had made against our team. The ump didn’t change his call. Immediately after that happened, I accidentally stepped on the ump’s foot. I apologized and then I wondered if he was going to think that I had done that on purpose. So I told him, “That was in no way intentional. I’ve never done this before, as I am sure you’ve already realized.”
I’m not a good catcher, but the game never came to a grinding halt as I had feared. I wasn’t so incompetent that I disrupted the game. I didn’t fair very well during my two at bats either. I struck out swinging with the bases loaded the first time around. Walking back to the bench, I said to my teammates, “I told you that you didn’t want me on the team. I told you that you would be better off with me as cheerleader.” But my teammates told me this was all just for fun and they didn’t care.
During my second at bat, I flied out. Both times I was at the plate, the pitcher told everyone on his team to move up -- even my first at bat. He judged that I couldn’t hit just by my appearance. That really irked me. It was a flashback to my gym class days when I was taunted and teased by my classmates and picked last for every team. I wanted to say to him, “Do you really think you have to say that? I mean, aren’t all your teammates already walking forward anyway? You need to grow up!”
Despite that, and despite playing sick, I had a good time. At the end of our game, no one knew if we had lost 13-4 or 15-4, but none of us cared. It was a great night for softball at the park.
posted by Stacey @ 4:19 PM
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